Gay Marriage Ban Overturned

The biggest headline yesterday had to be the federal judge’s overturning of the controversial California Proposition 8 passed by a 52-48% margin in November 2008. It has raised controversy once again, with comments ranging from an attack on traditional marriage to about time to “too soon.”

I have a few observations.

First, to anyone who thinks that once a majority voles for a proposition it must become law, I offer case after case of terrible and cruel laws passed and later overturned. Just because it is popular doesn’t make it right -- laws that isolated Jews throughout Europe leading to the Holocaust should be all that we need recall. A law can be good or bad; but courts have the obligation to review and decide.

For those who argue that marriage is a sacred estate between a man and a woman, I would remind them that marriage as we know it is a human construct from the Middle Ages when women and children were property, so that a man could be fairly certain his progeny was in fact his and entitled to any titles and inheritance he might hold. The other major reason for a marriage was to link two families together, to make each one stronger, and love had nothing to do with it. In other words, modern marriage was created out of greed. Male greed.

As things evolved, a monogamous relationship tied the woman to the man, while the man still was free to carry on affairs without impunity. This makes marriage sound particularly advantageous to the males of society.

For those who say that a child needs to know his or her mother AND father I would ask why so many children do not have a father to help raise them, because he left the building, and yet most of those children turn out functional with only one struggling parent to raise them.

And if marriage is so sacred, what is divorce?

I like traditional marriage, it works for me and has done for going on 36 years, but it works because my wife and I have made a promise to try to keep it going, to not stray, to work our problems out without throwing up our hands and walking away. I also have the distinct advantage of having married my best friend, and we’ve maintained that friendship even through our times of trouble. Bit it is so easy to give up, to quit, to dissolve.


I suggest we redefine marriage as a commitment before the community of men and women between two people who love each other, to try to build a life together.

It seems breathlessly simple.